Transcending traditional ideas to create purpose

Keywords

Resilience – Self-awareness – Authenticity – Creativity - Continuous Learning – Critical Thinking

In this episode of Resilience Unravelled Deevo Tindall talks about his problem-solving approach to customer service and his personal experiences of starting his own marketing agency. He emphasises the importance of self-awareness, authenticity in business narratives, and continuous learning and also discusses the pressure put on students within the American education system to achieve academic excellence and the importance of teaching students about alternative paths to success.

Deevo shares his personal experiences of questioning established norms and processes in the corporate world, the importance of critical thinking and the roles of creativity and conformity in organisations and society.

Main topics

• The 'superpower' approach in business

• Strategic growth and the importance of resilience in business.

• Personal and professional reinvention

• The importance of authenticity in business narratives and the dangers of businesses telling inauthentic stories.

• The concept of "shadow work,"and redefining one's identity.

• The different paths to success and the importance of introspection in life.

• Pragmatic, creative approaches to problem-solving

• Is tension in organisations necessary or beneficial.

• Why finding a sense of identity and fulfilment, regardless of whether one is creative or not, is key to a satisfactory life.

• The concept of resilience in setting smart goals.

Action items

Find out more about Deevo at Fusion Creative or through his social media at LinkedIn and Instagram.

 You can listen to the podcast in full and find out further information here. Our upcoming guest list is also available along with our previous blogs.
Find out more about our innovative Resilience and Burnout solutions.   

Journaling for self-awareness and growth

Keywords

Resilience – Journaling – Leadership – Self-awareness - Growth

In this episode of Resilience Unravelled Antonio Garrido, an expert in leadership transformation and Founder and President of My Daily Leadership, discusses the importance of journaling for self-awareness and personal growth. Antonio explains how he was led to journaling, how it helps develop emotional intelligence and resilience, and identify blind spots. He emphasises the need to be intentional and specific in writing down thoughts and beliefs, and how important it is in building self-awareness and gratitude. Antonio also provides practical steps for starting journaling, including affirmations, setting goals, and reflecting on progress.

Main topics

• The importance of journaling and how to start it.

• How journaling can enhance learning and personal development.

• Prompts and exercises for journaling.

• How journaling helps with self-awareness, resilience, emotional intelligence, etc.

• Journaling to help in setting goals and affirmations, beliefs, and commitments.

 Timestamps

1: Introductions - 00:02-00:18
2: Antonio's Background - Antonio shares a brief overview of his background, including his Spanish and Greek heritage, his experience working for large organisations, and his decision to become a coach - 00:50-02:34
3: The Conversation with the Group Chairman - Antonio recounts a conversation he had with the group chairman, where he was asked to write down the characteristics of a terrible boss. This conversation serves as a practical exercise - 12:09-15:38
4: The Importance of Journaling - Antonio discusses the significance of journaling and how it can enhance learning and personal development. He shares his own experience of journaling and explains different models that can be followed - 19:40-26:59
5: Setting Goals and Closing Gaps - Antonio emphasises the importance of setting goals and closing gaps. He suggests starting with affirmations, core values, and personal and business goals, and encourages the audience to write about them - 28:01-31:47
6: Commitments and Evaluation - Antonio introduces the concept of making daily commitments and evaluating progress. He explains the process of morning momentum and evening evaluation, encouraging the audience to give themselves a report card - 33:13-35:12
7: Resources and Conclusion - Antonio provides information about his book, website, and resources related to leadership and journaling. He expresses gratitude for the conversation and concludes the podcast - 36:31-37:26

Action items

• For more information about Antonio and more resources and information on journaling and leadership development visit mydailyleadership.com

• Antonio’s latest book is My Daily Leadership

  You can listen to the podcast in full and find out further information here. Our upcoming guest list is also available along with our previous blogs.
Find out more about our innovative Resilience and Burnout solutions.   

Safe conversations for work and life

 Keywords

Resilience – Trauma – Mental Health – Fulfilment – Purpose – Self-awareness – Safe Conversations

In this episode of Resilience Unravelled Bill Carson, a visionary leader in mental health, wellbeing, shares his personal experience of childhood trauma and how he overcame it through therapy and understanding brain chemistry. Bill emphasises the importance of taking care of our mental health by focusing on both psychological and physical well-being and also discusses the significance of finding a sense of purpose in life and serving others as part of building resilience. The conversation highlights the need for a holistic approach to mental health that includes addressing biological, psychological, social, and existential factors.

 Bill also discusses his experience as a volunteer crisis supporter and the fulfilment he receives from helping others. He emphasises the importance of not letting external factors overshadow one's own identity, relationships, and sense of connectedness and concept of finding purpose through the three levels of happiness: pleasure, passion, and purpose. He also touches on psychological safety in conversations at work and how it contributes to overall well-being.  

Main topics

• The importance of managing automatic negative thoughts (ANTs).

• The process of negating harm from a childhood incident.

• Cognitive repair and the importance of positive thinking.

• The importance of purpose and learning to learn.

• The importance of self-awareness and identifying suitable resources.

• How safe conversations can still be robust and professional.

• The importance of creating a safe and healthy culture for conversations

Timestamps

1: Introductions. 00:02 - 01:08

2: Impact of Childhood Trauma. Bill discusses the challenges of childhood trauma and how it can affect people's lives, often without their conscious memory of the original incident. He emphasises the importance of learning to manage and change perceptions of trauma. 01.08 - 04:23

3: Overcoming Childhood Trauma. Bill shares his personal experience of dealing with childhood trauma and how he discovered helpful approaches. 04:29 - 06:46

4: Finding Purpose. Bill explores the concept of finding purpose in life and how it relates to resilience. He highlights the importance of having a sense of belonging to a higher purpose and aligning personal actions with that purpose. 06:47 - 14:23

5: Discovering Personal Purpose. Bill discusses the process of uncovering one's purpose and offers an example of building a cathedral as a metaphor for finding purpose through meaningful work. 14:24 - 19:03

6: Psychological Safety and Safe Conversations. Russell raises the topic of psychological safety and safe conversations in the workplace and asks the guest, Bill, to share his insights. Bill explains the importance of creating a safe environment for open and honest conversations to support individual growth and performance. 19.04-25:03

7: Safe Conversations Skills for Managers. Bill introduces his book, "Safe Conversations for Work and Life," which focuses on developing safe conversation skills for managers to foster a culture of psychological safety in the workplace. He explains the process of helping team members become self-aware and identify suitable resources for support. 25.04 – 27.46

8: Emotional Fitness and Resilience. Russell briefly mentions a model of resilience and emotional fitness on Bill's website. They express interest in exploring this topic in more detail and provide information on how listeners can access the resources and contact Bill. 27:47 - 29:24

9: Conclusion: The host thanks Bill for the conversation and provides information on where listeners can find more about Bill's work and his book. 29:35 - 29:50

Action items

You can find out more about Bill at https://inspirelearning.au/skills-for-leaders-managers/

His book is Safe Conversations for Work and Life.

  You can listen to the podcast in full and find out further information here. Our upcoming guest list is also available along with our previous blogs.
Find out more about our innovative Resilience and Burnout solutions.   

Self-awareness. The number one leadership skill?

Keywords

Resilience – Leadership – Self-awareness – Engagement – Emotional Intelligence – Bad Bosses

In this episode of Resilience Unravelled Rob Kalwarowsky, a TEDx speaker and the co-host of the Leadership Launchpad Project, discusses his experience with bad bosses and the impact it had on his mental health. Rob shares how he overcame depression and launched a career in leadership coaching.

Before transitioning into leadership coaching and speaking, Rob spent over 10 years as an engineer within mining, oil pipelines, and consulting in heavy industry. He was also a 3-time Academic All-American in NCAA Water Polo and played on the U18 Canadian National Water Polo team.  Now he uses a combination of high-performance coaching, technology, and analytics to build winning teams and help leaders achieve their goals. 

Main topics

• The negative effects of toxic bosses on company performance and employee well-being

• The qualities a manager needs to build engagement

• Employee engagement as a measure of good leadership

• How work can provide meaning and purpose

• Mindset, self-awareness, and the importance of self-management

• Internal and external awareness

• The need for emotional intelligence in leadership

• Resources for dealing with bad bosses

• Internal family systems and how it breaks down the internal world into parts or masks.

Timestamps

1: Introductions - 00:02 - 02:29
2: The Importance of Deep Work - 02.30 - 05:19
3: Self-Awareness as the Key Leadership Skill - 05.20 - 07:22
4: The Link Between Leadership and Engagement - 7.23 - 09:10
5: The Role of Managers in Building Engagement - 09.11 - 12:51
6: Leveraging Strengths and Purpose in Leadership - 12.53 - 18:01
7: Emotional Intelligence and Relational Intelligence - 18.02 - 23.02
8: Conclusion and Further Resources - 23.03 - 26.43

Action items

• Listen to Rob’s "Leadership Launchpad Project"

• Visit his website howtodealboss.com to access a free eBook on dealing with a bad boss. Use the code "resilience" to get $50 off the program offered on the website.

• Check out Robs Elite Performance page.

 You can listen to the podcast in full and find out further information here. Our upcoming guest list is also available along with our previous blogs.
Find out more about our innovative Resilience and Burnout solutions.   

Social media and the rise of toxic positivity.

During the pandemic many people found that maintaining a positive outlook helped them to cope. However, positivity can be a two-edged sword and, whilst it’s generally good for our mental health, unrelenting optimism or ‘toxic positivity’ can make us feel a whole lot worse.

The phrase ‘toxic positivity’ refers to the excessive and unhealthy promotion of positive thinking and the denial, invalidation, or suppression of negative emotions or experiences. It occurs when people are encouraged to always maintain a positive attitude, even in the face of genuine challenges, difficulties, or hardships. No matter how bad a situation looks, positivity needs to be maintained and anything that triggers a negative emotion must be rejected.

This pressure to always maintain a positive attitude can be exacerbated by social media platforms where people showcase their accomplishments, happy moments, and positive experiences. A constant stream of curated content can create unrealistic expectations and make others feel inadequate or flawed if their lives don't match up. Seeing other people’s seemingly perfect lives can create a sense of pressure to portray oneself in the same way and lead to feelings of inadequacy and anxiety. As content users share will favour positive experiences and achievements, the illusion that everyone's lives are consistently positive and perfect further reinforces toxic positivity.

Because social media platforms thrive on likes, comments, and shares, users may seek validation and approval through positive feedback and engagement resulting in a tendency to focus on presenting a positive image to garner more attention and affirmation. This further perpetuaties toxic positivity and encourages the dismissal or invalidation of negative emotions. People may feel pressured to quickly move past challenges or hardships, suppressing their true feelings in favour of maintaining a positive image which can lead to a lack of emotional authenticity and hinder genuine connection and support.

It is important to remember that social media itself is not inherently toxic or negative. It can be a powerful tool for connecting, sharing experiences, and spreading positivity. However, the way in which it is used and the behaviours it can encourage may contribute to the perpetuation of toxic positivity, so it is essential people are mindful of these influences and cultivate a healthy balance between sharing positivity and acknowledging the full range of human emotions and experiences.

Whilst negative emotions are seen as a failure or weakness and are unpleasant and hard to deal with, they are important and need to be dealt with openly and honestly and although it’s undeniably a good thing to look on the bright side and be grateful for what we have, it’s also important to acknowledge and listen to our emotions – even when they’re not as pleasant.

Ambiverts as leaders

Generally, people are thought to be either introverts or extroverts although most us sit somewhere along this spectrum. Whilst introverts enjoy peace and reflection and may be happier working on their own, extroverts thrive on being around people, engaging with others and enjoying social connection.

If though you possess both traits and can naturally shift your behaviour depending on the environment you’re in then you might be seen as an ambivert. Ambiverts have a balance of both introverted and extroverted personality traits so they may enjoy socialising and being around people, but also need time alone to recharge their batteries. They can be outgoing and assertive when needed, but also reflective and introspective when required. They are comfortable in a variety of social situations, but may also feel drained after extended periods of interaction.

They can also make good leaders and managers as they are adaptable to a variety of situations and can communicate effectively with different types of people. For example, they can be assertive and decisive when needed, but also listen to and empathise with their team members. They can balance the needs of the organisation with the needs of their team members, creating a positive work environment that encourages collaboration and productivity.

Ambivert leaders can also leverage their ability to connect with people to build strong relationships with stakeholders, clients, and employees, which can lead to better outcomes for the organisation. Additionally, they can be comfortable in both leading from the front and delegating tasks to others, which makes them well-rounded managers.

The downside is that ambivert leaders can sometimes struggle with decision-making because they may weigh both sides of an issue equally and find it difficult to choose a course of action. This can lead to delays in decision-making and inaction, which can be problematic in a fast-paced work environment. Another potential downside is that they can  sometimes struggle with prioritising their time and energy and, as they enjoy both socialising and spending time alone, they may find it challenging to balance their work and personal lives. Finally, possessing both introverted and extroverted traits, means they may need to adjust their leadership style depending on the situation so they may struggle to find a leadership style that works for them.

Overall, whilst there are potential downsides to ambivert leaders, these can be mitigated through self-awareness, effective time management, and a willingness to adapt their leadership style if and when needed.

Mindfulness in nature.

Karen Liebenguth has been working with individuals, teams and groups for 12 years, using green spaces, mindfulness and coaching to foster personal and professional development, mental resilience and wellbeing. Karen was one of the first people in the UK to start coaching while walking in nature after finding that both she and her clients get far better results outside rather than sitting indoors.  

Karen became interested in linking the threes areas together after she suffered some mental ill health herself. Around fifteen years ago she was heading a team for a corporate company but received very little line management support. She was suffering from anxiety, sleeplessness and a lack of confidence and needed to do something about it. A friend suggested she look into meditation and from that she thought abouttraining as a coach herself. She signed up for weekend coaching event and that was the start of her new career and setting up and running her own business.

Nature is really the space in which Karen prefers to work with her clients and this goes back to her childhood. She always had a deep connection with nature and is grateful to her mother who was a nature lover and took Karen and her sister on bike rides and walks, Her mother was a single mother who worked full time so the time they had was limited but the time they did have was spent outside and this really helped when life wasn't easy. 

Being in nature supported Karen’s own mental health so when she started coaching and working with clients, she wanted to bring nature into work so they could benefit from it as well. Over the past few years there has been a large shift towards different types of outdoor coaching but there is a lot of evidence to show that being in nature is good for us. We all know what it feels like when we go into our local park or into our back garden. We feel different because we come from nature, it’s our place of origin. The pandemic has put the benefits of being in nature on the agenda for both mental and physical health. E. O. Wilson coined the term biophilia hypothesis, the idea that we have an innate attraction to seek connection to the natural work. It is also well documented that spending time in nature reduces the heart rate, stress and hormone levels as well as boosting the immune system and reducing feelings of loneliness, isolation and depression.

Mindfulness is a skill that needs application and practice. Karen feels it’s training for the mind in the same way physical exercise trains muscles. She also thinks that mindfulness happens in the relationship between our brain and our environment. It is often talked about as if mindfulness only happens in the brain but neuroscience has shown the brain can change but it doesn’t happen on its own.

Mindfulness is so much more than self-awareness. Its about paying attention to the body, emotions, events, how we relate to other people and our environment. Its also about heartfulness, the attitude we bring to ourselves and others. In any situation we can choose the attitude we bring - whether we are open, friendly, kind, compassionate and respectful or whether we are closed, harsh, and critical. Mindfulness helps bring a non-judgemental attitude to ourselves, our own experience and to other people as well as helping us to get to know ourselves so we understand how our actions impact on other people and our surroundings.

Karen feels that we have to experience mindfulness for ourselves, that we have to come to it because we are curious enough about the idea that it might enhance our life.

You can find out more about Karen and her work at greenspacecoaching.com

You can listen to the podcast in full and find out further information here. Our upcoming guest list is also available along with our previous blogs.

Pulling the gems from adversity. Mindsets and tools to rebuild, inspire and dream bigger.

The latest episode in our Resilience Unravelled series has now been released, Resilience Unravelled - Pulling the gems from adversity. Mindsets and tools to rebuild, inspire and dream bigger.

Susan De Lorenzo is an author, speaker and certified transformational life coach who focuses on helping women who are emerging from life-altering adversities. As a survivor of invasive breast cancer whose marriage dissolved as treatment ended, Susan draws on her personal journey as well as her training as a life coach to give clients, readers and listeners the mindsets and tools to rebuild their lives in alignment with their deepest desires.

Susan works with her clients to build a mindset where, no matter what has happened, you believe you can create something even greater through a higher platform of awareness to give inspiration to dream bigger and go for more.

Although her mother was a breast cancer survivor, when Susan had her breast cancer diagnosis she was shocked.  She never imagined it would happen to her and the diagnosis unravelled her. The first diagnosis was not the most serious. During a check up her oncologist asked if anyone had spoken to her about the lump in her other breast. At the time Susan was working full-time, had an 18-month old son and a new house that needed a lot of work and she found that she was very angry. The diagnosis was very hard to digest and she was very resistant to it and didn’t even want to do chemo.

People sometimes describe cancer as a battle but Susan thinks we need to develop the relationship we have with ourselves which is what gets us through. When adversity hits us we need to ask what can I do with myself to make it OK - I know it’s not going to be great but how can I keep my awareness that I’m not alone and am connected to life. Knowing that can be the strength by making it real for ourselves and our centre or eye of the storm. We are the centre of our own experience. Families often don’t know what to do to help and we end up comforting them. They don't have the skills to help or they have their own thoughts and feelings about what you’re going through. We need to remember that's their experience, I have mine.  

In the US divorces relating to couples where one is going through cancer are higher than the national average. Susan knew her marriage was going to be problematic but was determined to get married and have a family. She grew up with a parent who suffered with depression and this was something Susan’s partner suffered from as well.

Susan had 4 surgeries and 6 months of chemo and radiation but was then told she was cancer free. She found she had a new love of life. She wasn't going to play small anymore and was at a higher level but her partner was in depression. Susan felt they should work at their relationship but her partner wanted to be alone – he couldn’t deal with how happy Susan was.

When we go through adversity and start to come out the other side we sometimes find that we are going at a different speed to our partner. The other person is still where they were and unless you move together it becomes a challenge

The model of marriage is very romantic but the idea of staying together is impossible unless both people are growing. We need to remember it’s OK to let go if the other person doesn't grow at the same level. People move ahead and change. It takes something fundamental to change. We need to re-engineer relationships and remain interested in growth and what’s going to be next. We need to have something to look forward and to stay real by talking about the elements of life, what’s happening in the world and what’s happening to friends.

Susan works with clients coming out of life altering adversities.  The first thing they learn is to understand is that it’s not just other people who overcome adversity and that they can too. They need to be open to the idea that this is for me too so how can I design my life so it gets me to a place where I love my life.  This needs building and learning to overcome beliefs and conditioning – the not good enough syndrome.

Susan now spends her time between Rhode Island and Florida. Later this year Balboa Press will be publishing her new book Pulling the Gems from Adversity where she shares the five stages of working through adversity to come back even stronger.

You can listen to the podcast in full and find out further information about Susan here. Our previous podcast episodes and upcoming guest list are also available.

Our full blog archive is also available.

You can get in touch with Susan at https://SusanDeLorenzo.com or at her Facebook page

It's easy to meditate. Just sit down and get started.

The latest episode in our Resilience Unravelled series has now been released, Resilience Unravelled – It’s easy to meditate. Just sit down and get started.

In this episode, Dr. Russell Thackeray talks to Adam Weber, an author, speaker and highly successful commercial real estate business owner who is based to the north of New York City. Adam also has a progressive form of Multiple Sclerosis and uses meditation as a way of helping him to calm his mind, reduce his stress and see improvements in his pain and other symptoms. Now, he also helps other people learn to deal with their stress though meditation.

14 years ago, whilst working in the highly stressful world of commercial real estate, Adam was diagnosed with MS. The diagnosis came as a complete shock and left him struggling to walk and at times unable to eat. MS is aggravated by stress and Adam suffered with anxiety and depression as he tried to meet the demands of his day-to-day life.

Although both his parents worked in the medical profession, Adam wasn’t happy in taking a solely medication approach to his MS. He had used meditation infrequently in the past so he became interested in using it as a way of managing his MS. Once he realised how meditation could help with the mental, physical and emotional problems created by stress, he started helping other people use meditation to deal with their stress.

Adam wanted to take the ‘woo woo’ away from meditation and make it simple and easy to practice so he created his own ‘Easy to Meditate’ programme. He feels meditation is really about resting your mind and taking yourself out of the world we live in so you can concentrate on your breathing and focus. By closing your eyes and breathing in though your nose and out your mouth, you can start to focus on a place where nothing is going on so you can let your thoughts go and slow down your body and mind.

There are so many benefits in reducing stress and Adam wants people to be able to practice mediation anywhere – to be able to leave their business environment and be able to go to their car, the park or a spare office and take time for themselves.  There’s no need for incense, flowers or special clothes, you just need to sit down and get started.  

There is a difference between simple relaxation where you sit down, read a book or watch TV and meditation. Mediation physically changes the brain and works with heart to help you compartmentalise where you are

Adam feels that mediation is a skill that people can learn at their own pace. It needs practice and to develop good results it can take a few weeks. A good habit generally takes 21 – 30 days in place before you see results but the more you do, the better the results you’ll see.  

You can listen to the podcast in full and find out further information about Adam here. Our previous podcast episodes and upcoming guest list are also available.

Our full blog archive is also available.

You can find out more about Adam and his book at here.

What we want, not what we need. Technology and self-awareness.

The latest episode in our Resilience Unravelled series has now been released, Resilience Unravelled – What we want, not what we need. Technology and self-awareness.

In this episode, Dr. Russell Thackeray talks to Daniel Jenkins whom he met when he guested on his podcast The Freelance Entrepreneur. Daniel is also a consultant solicitor, working for two London law firms and specialising in civil and construction litigation, something that can be both contentious and stressful!

Daniel set up his podcast to help younger people with the practical and mental health elements found in starting up a business. He feels many younger people suffer from stress and anxiety when they start their own business and his podcast aims to provide them with tools he would have found useful when he was starting up his own business.

Every generation faces it’s own set of challenges. What Daniel feels is facing the younger generation now, is the advancement of technology and the pressures that come with it. Using the legal profession as an example, clients used to contact solicitors by telephone and letter so work could be done reasonably slowly because there were days to respond. Now, most people can access their work emails on their phone so expect a response in minutes and hours rather than days. This brings the expectation that responses have to be provided quickly and at any time because potential clients will go somewhere else if their requests are not answered straight away.

It is possible that generational attitudes to technology may not be as straightforward as people tend to think. Because they grew up without it, many older people now see the introduction of technology as an enabling toolkit whilst to some younger people it is enslaving with increased expectations. Daniel grew up in a world where work contact has always been by email and mobile so its difficult for him to image a world where you can’t be contacted immediately.  Because he didn't know the world beforehand, technology doesn’t seem liberational or transformational as it might to someone older.

Some professions have embraced technology whilst others have been slower. Daniel feels the legal profession usually lags a little behind and is not moving as quickly as it could. Technology is available but isn’t utilised fully.  If systems that improve time efficiency and keep costs down for clients aren’t updated, firms will quickly get left behind.

Introducing new technology can also mean that roles become soulless and lacking in meaning and purpose. Pigeon holing people so they deal with the same thing over and over again can be the most efficient way to run a business but its not good for the people doing the work. They become a cog in a machine and miss the challenge of doing something different, something that's not just a tick box exercise. When a job becomes a simple transaction process, it loses any sense of purpose, which in turn affects mental wellbeing.

Millenials in particular have had a pretty tough time. Their parents brought them up to expect that they will have a job with meaning and purpose but the gig economy, highly computerised, low value, low brainpower jobs means their expectations for a better life have not been met. They also have to deal with the ideal portrayed by social media and the idea that ‘if they can have it I can and if I don't get it I’m doing something wrong’. As a society we’re not keeping up with technological advances. We don't understand the impact on people of being exposed to social media 24/7 – the pressure to fit in, to be instantly contactable and constantly ‘on’ - so its no wonder people exhibit anxiety.

Younger people need to be given the tools to deal with social media at an early age so that they have a choice and know that access should be limited to ‘as much as you want but not what you need’.

You can listen to the podcast in full and find out further information about Daniel here. Our previous podcast episodes and upcoming guest list are also available. Our full blog archive is also available.

You can get in touch with Daniel at The Freelance Entrepreneur.co.uk or through LinkedIn