Redefinng midlife for women

Jacqueline or Jack Perez runs a digital platform dedicated to normalising ageing for women through highly curated content and women driven brands. Jack feels that ageism is the last ism left and it's the one we do mostly to ourselves.

Jack feels that it’s something that happens to a lot of women when we start to look in the mirror at a certain age and don't particularly like what is reflected back to us.  It could be a line, a wrinkle, a sag or an age spot but we start to feel ‘less than’ and to internalise bad self talk that we are not as valuable. In North America there is also a very user centric culture so it adds to the feeling of being devalued over time.

There is currently a big push in society around the science of longevity. This can be a challenge as we are often not very good at knowing how to live as we get older, primarily because we are very family centric. Kids grow up and leave home and you’re left with a relationship that's slightly festered over the years or on your own and wondering what do you do next. Both women and men in their 50’s are thinking that they could have 30 or 40 years of this, but 30 or 40 years of what?

In the UK we’ve seen what’s known as 3rd age phenomenon which is rethinking that.  There is a big zeitgeist of people who are excited by this stage in their lives, have been liberated from everything else, are old enough not to care sometimes but also to have the wherewithal to think ‘OK what could be next?’ They are looking for a source of information, a friendly face or place that relates to them where they and say ‘this is something that I could do or someone who I could be’.

At the moment we are in a unique position. The average lifespan of a white woman in the early 1900’s was 51. Although there were people who lived to their 80s or 90s this was not as a cohort or large sector of the population. Now is the first time that there is a very large number or a high concentration of people in this space. The Baby Boomers, the Gen X’s and now even the older Millenials are all entering this space and the exciting thing is that we get to define what that seed change looks like and the new paradigm. Women are hungry to look for the modeling of ‘what can my life look like in my 60s 70s and 80s?’ This is why Jack built the platform and brought together global thought leaders on the topics that are important to women in the extra years that they didn’t get 100 years ago.

The idea of having a community of liberated free thinkers seems to be quite exciting. Every day a new article gets pushed out about a relevant topic. It doesn’t shy away from the tough subjects but deals with them in an empowering, kind and productive manner. It’s not about shaming or scaring anyone rather its about providing valuable information that's actionable in the different areas. For example, if you’re looking in your closet as a 55 or 58 year old and asking ‘can I wear any of the stuff I used to wear when I was in my 30s or 40s?’ There are articles about fashion in mid life and beyond and article about skin care and makeup. The best place to start is the About page. Just scroll down so you can access articles from women around the world and find the topic that's relevant to you.

Jack found that when she was going through menopause herself she couldn't find any positive relevant information to help her so she started the platform because she didn't want other women to feel alone or scared. Loneliness and isolation are leading indicators of longevity – you will live longer if you have connections with other humans. Neither smoking, drinking nor being obese are not as dangerous to your health as being isolated and lonely.  They are also major causes of depression and also dementia. In a world where we are more connected we are increasingly isolated.

Jack earned her MBA from the University of Chicago and was then hired by Hewlett Packard in San Francisco where she worked for several years. She wasn't really corporate material though so in 1999 she left the corporate world and started a PR and marketing business with her then husband. It was the heyday of the late 90s with .com bubble and lots of venture capital money. It was a very buoyant environment but not at all sustainable in the longer term. Jack became a single mum late in life so started working in smaller companies in fractional executive roles that helped her spend more time with her child. She then went through the menopause and that's when she realised she needed to do something not for her but for everyone else!

There does seem to be a reappraisal of ones life at the time of menopause and there is science behind this. It's a time when women lose a lot of the hormones that make them maternal and want to take care of people. Post menopause many don't feel as maternal as they used to. Jack didn't realise just how tied she was to that feeling, need, drive or biological imperative. She had no idea how critical, crucial or all encompassing it was until it dissipated. Women can also become more vibrant at this time of life so if there is a mismatch in a relationship it can become more evident and, in the US, the highest number of divorces are issued by women aged 50 and above. There seems to be a lot of women who at 50 just say ‘I don't want to be married to you any more’ perhaps because the dream has changed or been fulfilled in a way.

The idea that we should be empowered to go out and start a new life is exciting. The problem and opportunity with a youth culture is that older people are often seen as wiser and are used as mentors. Younger people want to gain an edge and this often comes from people who have been there and done it before. Interestingly, the platform attracts younger people as well as the target market with half of the audience being under 45. Jack feels that this is because they are curious about what is coming so they are empowering themselves by learning.

You can find out more about Jack at www.kuellife.com or info@kuellife.com

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